Ordinary 19C – August 11, 2019

Luke 12:32-40

A little boy wasn’t getting good marks in school. One day he tapped his teacher on the shoulder and said, “I don’t want to scare you, but my daddy says if I don’t get better grades, somebody is going to get a spanking.”

Jesus does not say, “I don’t want to scare you.” Jesus says, “do not fear.”

Today is an odd Sunday morning. I am writing this blog just as I have begun my Sunday mornings for many years with a cup of coffee and my laptop. And I am feeling blessed by my internet this morning. She has been away for several days, and I fear that she may leave again at any moment. Even now I feel that slowwwww walk towards the door. And unlike my recent Sabbaths, I will not be leaving for church in a few hours. Instead, I will be cut off from the outside. The powers are closing the state road for something called the Ironman Triathalon. When the internet goes, we will truly be off the grid. To misquote REM: It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I am not afraid.

Lenny had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn’t do something about it. So Lenny went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. Lenny slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning by almost two hours. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work.

“Boss”, he said, ” The pill actually worked!”

“That’s all fine” said the boss, ” But where were you yesterday?”

Have a great week – Laurin

Author: lectionaryamusing

I am a retired Presbyterian minister who served a very small New Jersey church. My hope is to provide humor and story for the lectionary preacher. If any of my humor or stories are proprietary to you, this is unintentional, so please advise.

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